hen this request from Amaka came at the wee hour of the morning to write an article on the above topic, half awake, I agreed. But, on being fully awake, I realized the vastness of the subject. Frankly speaking, how can one tackle a theme that is as diverse as the number of tribes and ethnic groups in Africa where not only the people’s traditional marriage rites differ from one group to another within few kilometers of each other but also from one country to another. As such, no single rite can be said to represent a country, how much so the continent. All the same, there are few similarities in these ceremonies as pertain in the three major tribes in my country, Nigeria – Ndigbo, Yorubas, and Hausa/Fulani. So, I will concentrate on these in order to give a miniscule insight to the topic, because tackling the whole continent would require extensive research and a book written on it to do justice to the theme.

 

“Marriages are made in heaven” so goes the adage. Well, not so in the past in Africa. It was made on earth at the whims of fathers, in most cases to cement family and business ties and forge powerful alliances. Sometimes, the choice of groom was based on the profession of his family, ancestors, great farmers, strong warriors, fantastic bards etc.

Girls were often betrothed at infancy and had no say in the choice of her future life partner who could be old enough to be her father.

This of course was not exclusively African as it was then a worldwide phenomenon. But that’s where the similarities ended. In my part of the world, Nigeria, the Ndigbos who inhabit the Eastern part of Nigeria breaks the rite into three distinct stages: Iku aka n`uzo: The informal initial meeting with the girl’s (probably about three years old) family by the future husband’s family to show intent. Native kola-nuts and kegs of palm wine were presented to her parents. With the acceptance of the of the gifts, the groom’s family made arrangements to plow and maintain her father’s farm for seven farming seasons to ensure rich crop yields for him. At the end of the seven years, the groom’s people revisited her family to formally present the request for her in marriage. She’s on the threshold of puberty and during this visit, a list of requirements was presented to his family and a date’s fixed for the second stage. Igba nkwu nwanyi: The formal presentation of the bridal items after about three more years when the girl is in her adolescence. These items include gifts for her parents, food items, domestic animals, kegs of palm wine, native kola nuts, and of course, the bride price. In some areas, before the items were presented, all the maidens who were about to get married performed a pre-wedding rite called aziza iyi – the sweeping of the floor of the stream with bare hands. This ancient marriage rite’s a symbolic interpretation of procreation. The aim was for each maiden to catch crab or fish with her bare hands. If she caught a crab first it was a sign that her first born would be a boy, and a fish first, a girl. Of course, more fish were caught to the disappointment of many. Any maiden who failed to catch anything had her igba nkwu nwanyi postponed until the next batch performed the rite- a cause for sadness in her family, while the successful maiden moved to the next stage. In some areas, the maidens were taken to fattening houses where they’re lavishly fed and fattened up for their grooms because the men of those days preferred robust wives. They were also taught the ground rules of wifely chores.