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| afro style mag | afrobeauty |
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 s an African woman, I grew up reading magazines like Vogue, InStyle or Cosmopolitan and lusting after Boy bands like Boys II Men, 3T and Backstreet Boys. I'd sit in my room or during free periods in school and just gaze dreamily at the likes of Naomi Campbell and Halle Berry. It’s necessary that I point out that I was about a size 6 growing up with collar bones so deep that my mother used to tease me about them being water retentive. In my bid to look good, I went as far as auditioning for the MNET “Face of Africa”. I’d seen the likes of Oluchi Onweagba and Liya Kebede go from natural beauties to absolute stunners. I wanted to look just like that.
When I graduated from high school, I got admitted into a university to study law and almost immediately looking good became an obsession. As if the fates were being ironic, I started to develop stretch marks on my breasts and bottom- it was horrifying to me. None of the beauties on the pages of my magazines had stretch marks!!! I hated my body, and my looks. My legs were too long and skinny I wasn’t the prettiest girl growing up.
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I used to wish my dad was wealthy so that I could afford to have surgery done on those bits. Then I met a girl who had stretch marks on her breasts, bottom, stomach, arms and legs and didn’t seem to mind flaunting them in a bikini. I began to question my stupidity.
There are times I’ve tried to imagine what it was like living in the days of our fore fathers. I don’t think women cared much about their imperfections then as we do now. Going through history books and tales of old, women either had saggy or firm breasts.
Everyone’s hair was natural and devoid of chemical applications. There was never any question about looking for plants or herbs to increase their bust size as it is today. They used charcoal to brush their teeth for whiteness, shea butter as body creams. Their sponges were plucked from trees and their soaps were made from palm kennels. Yet it does seem like they had smooth and supple skin. Most of them were robust and round, some were slim and slender. They wore no make up, used no deodorants, perfumes or body sprays and I assume those who actually had these luxuries were the really rich people.
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Fast forward to present day and it’s a different story entirely. The price women have paid for beauty over the years has become alarming. The modern woman obviously tired of lice and the drama that came with having natural hair, relaxed it. As if that was not enough, most of us began to invest in and fix hair extensions. The Western world introduced a trend, and Africa greedily accepted it. The pressure to be as slim as the models on the Catwalk, the likes of Claudia Schiffer and Bar Refaeli began to mount. The ageless beauty of Sophia Loren coupled with beautiful hair worn by the stars on the red carpet was a look we craved. There are those who embraced cosmetic surgery as a way of life; a face lift, a tummy tuck, breast augmentation, botox etc. For a lot of women, there is that drive to be confident in their own skin. The kind of confidence that years and years of therapy or self help would never produce. I understand at the end of the day when it's time for bed, it’s just us, our bodies and the damn mirror. We all have imperfections and most times these imperfections lead to insecurity.
At times I forget what if feels like to look African. To be proud of my size and be confident in my own skin- especially in a world where being artificial is celebrated by an increasingly globalised society. A society that makes people feel counterfeit for daring to be different as opposed to stereotypical. Don’t get me wrong, as an African woman the Western world has influenced me in a lot of positive ways. I’ve learned how to fight for my rights as a woman; I’ve been taught that the sky is the limit to my achievements. I’ve been given more options with regards to the things I can say, wear or do. I’ve learned other ways in which to improve myself.
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There have been drugs to cure malaria, slow down the spread of HIV etc. We owe all these to the western world, so talking about beauty compared to the big picture seems quite minut. After all is said and done, beauty is only skin deep.
I must applaud the African woman though for being confident and maintaining some sort of balance. We are beautiful whether or not we chose to use the provisions of the western world. There are a lot of full figured African women and we have actresses like Monique drumming on that fact. We don't have to be slim or wrinkle free; we do not have to fix hair extensions to look more beautiful. Our primary aim is to be comfortable with ourselves first and every other thing ranging from cosmetic surgery to other enhancements becomes secondary. As I type this article, I’m listening to Bette Midler belt out lyrics " Go away little girl, they used to say, hey you’re too fat, you’re too wack but this is my world to be who I choose". This is my song, this is my movie and my moon. So I woke up one morning, flossed my teeth and decided damn I’m fierce. I’m going to unleash my ferocity upon this unsuspecting world because "I’m Beautiful Dammit".
M. Okpaleke
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